First of Many, inshaAllah

Salaam.

Again, it's been too long.  My apologies.  I think I find it hard to regard the thought that someone might read this, seriously.  C'est la vie.  This time I'm putting update reminders in my planner, so that at least I remember that I want to update weekly.  Baby steps, right?  Right.

So let's have some updates, shall we?

Our month, but actually less, apart was terrifying, heart-wrenching and over nearly as soon as it started.  Alhamdulillah, I am not on a break with my dearest, and we are stronger, together, now.

I made one random fabulous meal in the last four months.  Okay so really it was a single pasta dish.  Whole wheat penne topped with lemon-garlic shrimp and aspargus.  This was my second time making it, and the improvement shows, believe me!

I'm still working at BMF, though not for lack of trying.  I've only had one interview so far.  The only place that has actually gotten back to me.  But!  I could be trying harder, so IA I', starting to be more proactive.  On that note, I hope to take the GREs soon, (any and all advice is welcome!) and will be enrolled in a class in the coming Spring semester.  I'm pretty excited about the class!

Oh, BMF.  Really, really really a terrible place to work, it turns out.  KD and I help each other along, though I fear she will soon find greener pastures, and I will be left to fend for myself.  If that happens, I've decided that I need to go in earlier a few days a week and have breakfast at home (with Char) the other couple of days.  Then, I can leave early or take lunch with Char as I please.

And so we are brought to the matrimonial segment of our program.  Apart from the Chicago wedding, five of my friends got married this summer.  Two girls I've known since childhood, one of my Wellesley little sisters, my adopted Wellesley little brother, and my dear friend AJ, from W, who met her now wife while we were in school.  They had a simple and beautiful ceremony on the Cape, during which I and our third musketeer, SL, recited from our respective Book.  The reception following was amazing.  There were W women I hadn't seen in ages, and of course the brides looked stunning.  Char came with me, and I think we were the second happiest couple there.  Not to mention the only brownies and only Muslims.  We got a lot of thank-you-for-comings and your-recitation-was-beautifuls.  Basically, a bunch of oldies from the Cape trying to show their open-mindedness.  It was cute.  Then there were the random people taking our photo, from posed to candid. That was a bit weird.  Anyway.  There was the engagement party in Long Island for my friend Tulip.  This past weekend, my girl Tina and her Irishman had their wedding reception in Beantown (this was one of the weddings in Bangladesh!).  Later this month, my good friend Tmoney is having her engagement party, though her betrothal was announced at the end of Ramadan.  And finally!  Pri, down in the ATL.  Her papers are signed but the big shindig is over the New Years break.  A big finale to a year with a ridiculous number of nuptials attended.

And just for fun, a funky cat with THUMBS!

xoxo

Life Without

Salaam.

July first.  Today's the first day.  Life without Char cannot be described in only one word.  But one of the things that it is?  Heartbreaking.  It's been nearly 24 hours since I've had any word from him, or he from me.  Every time I think to text him that single '<3' to make him smile, I can't.  When I want to call him and hear his voice to calm my heart, I can't.  When I hope to see him because I need to be held, I can't.  Our time apart is a mutual decision, but that makes it no less difficult, no easier to bear.  I don't want to get into the details of it, but I may need to vent here over the next few weeks.


More later, another time, inshaAllah.


xoxo

Homeward Bound

Salaam.
My goodness.  I can't seem to regularly update the blog at all!
So, yes, I'm homeward bound.  My family and I drove to Chicago to attend a family friend's daughter's holud and wedding.  She looked beautiful, mashAllah.  And Alhamdulillah she seemed very happy.  The bride and groom were aglow, laughing and smiling with each other.  InshaAllah one day I, too, will feel as she does.
We had a long drive through New Jersey.  No, I have not met or seen Snookie.... d:
What to write about?  An acquaintance of mine got married a few months ago.  She had a small nikkah with family.  I was disappointed while going through her pictures on Facebook because while I saw the groom's parents, and her father, an Imam, officiating, I did not see her mother.  I can only imagine how hurt she felt that her mother didn't attend.  (I assume that her mother could have gone.)  It is as likely as not that I'm projecting, but I'd hope that my mother would help plan and attend my wedding, whether she wholly approved of the man or not.  As long as he's a practicing Muslim and makes me happy, I like to think she'd at least fake it for a day or two.  Ionno.  Maybe that's asking too much.  Allahu 'alim.
June fourteenth, two thousand and eleven.  That was my one-year anniversary, Alhamdulillah.  <3
This post is turning out to be just as marriage-minded as the others!  Oh well.  The Chicago wedding was the first of many this summer.  I think I've mentioned this before, actually. Anyway, let the matrimony begin!  Haha!
Today's soap box topic: gay marriage.  Personal feelings aside, I've mentioned Islam's viewpoint on homosexuality before.  To recap, it is natural to feel attraction to the same sex and forbidden to act upon those feelings.  I don't know about Judaism, but from what I understand of Christianity, the same applies.
In a nation that supposedly was built on the separation of church and state, it is literally unthinkable that gay marriage would be illegal.  The social rite, marriage, is given by the state government, and is made official by a marriage certificate.  A marriage does not mean "happened in a place of worship."  You don't believe in it?  Fine.  Attend a church that won't perform them.  You think marriage is something that happens in a place of worship?  Lobby for all couples, queer and breeder, to be given civil union licenses.  Get the word removed from government use.  You have no right to stop any other people from getting married, when it is state-given.  You don't have to agree with it, but it is, at the least, every person's right in this country.
And don't give me nonsense about religion being used to make laws.  No.  I'm calling you on your bullshit.  Almost everyone (I'm not counting sociopaths) has an innate sense of what's right and what's wrong, what's "good"and what's "bad."  Being a secular state doesn't change the fact that murder is wrong and should be punishable.  If the Commandment didn't exist, you'd still know you shouldn't kill people; you just wouldn't know it's punishable by Hell. 
You don't think the nation should make it legal? Tough. Suck it up. America was founded on certain principles. Stick to them, or get out.
xoxo

New Beginnings

Salaam.

Friends, my sincerest apologies for not updating over the last month and a half.  InshaAllah I'll try to do better.  Things have been kind of hectic, but are settling down.  I have so much to share with you.

Firstly, I've hit the big two-five!  Yeah, I'm super old.  Okay, okay, not really old haha, but a year older, and inshaAllah a year wiser.  I spend the week celebrating among friends, one of whom hosted a party for me at her place.  It was intimate and amazing fun.

Second news:  I've joined the real world!  I have just finished my first month of my first real job.  Alhamdulillah!  The job search was short, sweet, and successful.  I've taken a Lab Associate position with a small start up near the city called Boston MicroFluidics (BMF).  I'm owrking on a project to develop a new rapid test for the detection of common STIs at home.  The founder B, and his best friend K, are my boss and supervisor, respectively.  Yup, there are only three of us in the lab.  They are in their late twenties, really intelligent, and incredibly funny.  Alhamdulillah it is a good fit for me, professionally, intellectually, and socially.  And to top it all off, I work close enough to Char's school that we can regularly have lunch together!

Char and I have had to readjust our plans.  Whereas we had hoped to be able to make our relationship official soon, it seems that the more responsible move is to wait until he is more stable in his income.  If we have learned one thing from our previous mistake (however sweet and romantic), it's that these things cannot be rushed.  To think so is naive.  His being further along in his education, and my having financial independence, are two ways to make sure neither family has an argument.  While being separate this way will be difficult, we will support each other through the tougher times and inshaAllah this proves to be the better decision in the long run.

There's one last thing I'd like to ramble on about.  The view of homosexuality that the general population of Muslims hold.  For starters, this is not a problem that is unique to Muslims.  Islam's view of homosexuality is straightforward, and yet many people seem to be confused or uneducated on the topic.  The short answer is that acting on homosexuality is forbidden, but the feelings are completely natural.  It is, as many aver, how Allah made you.  Being queer or questioning isn't haraam in and of itself.  That's the first part of my qualm with our community on this topic.  The other part is worse.  You don't believe homosexuality is real?  Fine.  But one of the most beautiful parts of Islam is its preaching of tolerance.  Its teachings of the Golden Rule and how to behave.  Where have we come as an Ummah, when all we do is judge others based on what we perceive and treat them not as they were meant to be treated, as human beings?

xoxo